Popular music can be an interesting window into where women are at in 2010.

Are we really so enlightened now?

I recently took a look at some of the Billboard Top 20 Charts, in particular the results for 2008.

Please, checkout some of these songs on Youtube … something to think about … what might the theme of these songs mean for women as a whole and yourself in 2010?

You should definitely not be so hard on yourself if you’ve lost your way.

In our modern life we are overwhelmed with images and themes which seem to bear no relation to true happiness and beauty and real love.

- or if these images do teeter closely to displaying what we’ve come to know as love,

more often than not it is in the context of desperately needing it or them and having to struggle to hold onto it.

Songs from the Top 20 Billboard charts 2008 sung by women included:

2. Bleeding Love - Leona Lewis - Spirit

3. No One - Alicia Keyes - As I Am.

6. No Air - Jordan Sparks - No Air

7. Love Song - Sara Bareilles - Little Voice

12. Take a Bow - Rhianna - Good Girl Gone Bad

14. Kissed a Girl - Kate Perry - One of the Boys

16. Disturbia - Rhianna - Good Girl Gone Bad

17. Don’t Stop the Music - Good girl Gone Bad

18. Pocketful of Sunshine - Natasha Bedingfield - Pocketful of Sunshine

The following is a snapshot/mashup of the lyrics; (admittedly I’ve focused on the more melancholy selection but all the same it’s still scarey that these messages are pouring out into popular culture with great momentum!)

And don’t tell me you’re sorry ’cause you’re not,

Baby when I know you’re only sorry you got caught

This was never the way I planned not my intention

I got so brave, drink in hand, lost my discretion

My head gets so confused, hard to obey

Release me from this curse I’m in

Trying to maintain but I’m struggling

What’s wrong with me?

Why do I feel like this?

I’m going crazy now

No more gas, in the rig, can’t even get it started

Nothing heard, nothing said, can’t even speak about it

On my life, on my head, don’t wanna think about it

Feels like I’m going insane, yeah

I just can’t refuse it

Take me away A secret place A sweet escape To better days My hiding place

Head underwater And they tell me to breathe easy for a while

Breathing gets harder, even I know that

Tell me how I’m supposed to breathe with no air

If I should die before I wake It’s ’cause you took my breath away

Losing you is like living in a world with no air

So how do you expect me to live alone with just me?

cause my world revolves around you it’s so hard for me to breathe

When the rain is pouring down and my heart is hurting

you will always be around this I know for certain

Closed off from love I didn’t need the pain

Once or twice was enough and it was all in vain

Time starts to pass Before you know it you’re frozen

Keep, keep bleeding love I keep bleeding

You cut me open…

Is it any wonder so many of us seem to unconsciously embrace depression as the mantle of what being a woman is in 2010?

We think we’re listening to something vital and meaningful…

In my opinion the above lyric content mix could easily trigger off a panic attack.

Of course there will be times when we need to wallow, and listen to some sad songs, it’s what we do.

But the point is these songs are a reflection of the best and most popular music that women had to offer in the United States in 2008.

The energy of these songs including their lyrics and music for the most part seem to lend themselves to a state of anxiety.

The video No Air is a prime example; it actually made me feel pangs of anxiety on viewing it.

If you haven’t experienced anxiety or depression this might seem like an overreaction; I know that many of you will know exactly what I’m referring to.

You are a beautiful soul that is separate to the manic mutterings of your own overwhelmed mind, and the sometimes hypnotic chanting of the popular media. Value yourself!Love yourself!Embrace your worthiness!You deserve to be happy,

you deserve love,

you deserve everything that life has to offer!

I would be really easy to dismiss this song as offensive and even disgusting, with it’s discussion of the mechanics of what happens in the bedroom with a less than pleasing lover.

However this song strikes an important  chord because women do tend to try and find 500 reasons why a man might be a selfish lover including blaming themselves, rather than just admitting the fact that he is only concerned with his own orgasm. 

The term ‘giving head’ is not supposed to refer to only one gender - or is it?

Farah left Charlies Angels the highly successful television show from the 70’s and after a string of unsuccessful film roles threw herself into grittier roles that would begin to expose the high levels of violence that many women were and still are subjected to. 

She helped to shed light on a subject that was uncomfortable for many at the time, as we were just beginning to realise the scope and ubiquitous nature of women and their relationship with violence.

Also we need to respect her attempts to shed light on and divert some resources towards a very unglamorous illness; and share some wisdom regarding terminal illness and how to approach it with dignity.    

We respect you and thank you for your legacy, and send you our prayers and loving energy, Farah. RIP.

http://www.newsweek.com/id/208382

Why Katherine Heigl Is Annoying - Newsweek article by Sarah Ball 24/7/2009.

On reading this Newsweek article I am reminded again of what an east target successful women can be.

If she was a man then this over reaction would be completely diluted.  

Another example for us to tease out the obvious sexist double standards and reassure ourselves that there’s a reason why we (women) are so hard on ourselves.

The collective consciousness of society dictates we fit into certain stereotypes and God forbid we should be human or ourselves in any way.

If this was George Clooney, another star from a legendary U.S. hospital based soap we would be smiling indulgently at his behaviour.

The following video is a must see and can give great relief if you are stressing right now about something.

It clarifies the importance of living in the now, and how the ‘insanity’ of constantly living in the past and/or future can end immediately leaving you at peace right now, no matter what is happening in your life.  

Some of the Youtube comments mentioned that Tolle isn’t very glamourous or a great speaker.  

Please be open to what he has to say as it has helped a lot of people and could help you a lot.  

In my own ongoing relationship with anxiety and depression his teaching has been extremely helpful to me.

Enjoy!

A wonderful book, I’ll let her speak about it…

This is must see video for everyone.

Be prepared that it might bring up some strange feelings; but these will be a signposts that can help you to move forward.

This video is extremely illuminating with people standing up and sharing.

Enjoy!

When I watched this video and several others on Youtube I was shocked to see some of the extreme comments made by people.

Whatever you might think of Madonna or her past antics the reaction to what she’s doing seems extreme and cynical.

It really is no one else’s business.

She has donated huge sums of money to children’s charities in Malawi which like it or not would have made a huge difference in the live’s  of many people, in ways we wouldn’t really begin to understand unless we’d lived in a place like Malawi. Would any of her detracter’s have donated as much as $1 towards a children’s charity?

To me the tendency to dwell hatefully on the actions of another is such a waste and an indicator of deeper issues within those making the comments.

The need to elevate oneself above another human being through energetic self righteous and sometimes highly crude language in that way speaks of a deep lack.

We all can find ourselves caught up in these feelings at times, due to being a diverse planet full of very human human beings it is inevitable that we will disagree strongly with other human beings at times.  -  

It’s unavoidable; but whether you wallow in these feelings or  quickly move on due to having an abundant life yourself, is what makes the difference.

This clip from Gilmore Girls is a great example of how we can get into a fight about something really silly -  

that actually has nothing to do with what we’re really upset about.

When it happens tension can be easily defused with humour.  

Life’s too short to over analyse!

Are you giving yourself uneccessary stress?

These girls are beautiful,

there’s nothing like making your own music.

Did you play an instrument at school?

Maybe it’s time to take it up again…